A nightmare before Stockholm

Wednesday 18th of February

I have a gig in Stockholm on Friday and I'm so excited. Usually I get a little nervous a few days before a show, but this week I've been surprisingly calm. That was until tonight.

For the first time in a while, I had a nightmare about the concert. I went up on stage, nervous, and started singing the first song. Immediately I forgot a bunch of lyrics and just walked around the stage. When I started the second song, the whole crowd started talking to each other. And one by one, they walked out.

The worst part was standing there singing to no one. In my dream I started crying, and then I woke up.

I was so relieved it was only a dream. And I woke up to the most amazing weather. I hate winter, but I'm okay with the cold if the sky is blue and the sun is out. And that's exactly what I got today.

It was my first day off in a long time. I've been taking a lot of shifts at work the last couple of weeks, so it felt sooo good to sleep in. Hopefully music can be my full-time job soon. But for now I'm okay with having a side job. I actually think it's good for me. Almost all my time away from work goes to thinking about music. Having to focus on something else grounds me, and I honestly think it's good for my mental health not to think about myself 24/7.

I have a weird obsession with sodas and energy drinks. Yesterday I tried a new Red Bull. It was pretty good, but it didn't really taste like cherry, and as a cherry lover I was a bit disappointed.

I'm also trying to decide what to wear on Friday. The black dress I've worn to almost every concert, or the new grey one? Mmm. I'll bring both and decide in Stockholm :)

We're driving there, by the way. My band and I are leaving at 5 in the morning on Friday. I'm going to be dead, but a road trip with the band is going to be fun. My plan is to get drunk on energy drinks (they're so cheap in Sweden) and then I'll be ready for the show. Haha.

Anyway, that was it for today.

XOXO
JOA